Father's Day

                              Father's Day Once Again

 Here we are again soon it will be father's day. I did not send any cards out to the dads this year. I did not because I do not get any cards from my dad or your's for my birthday or any other occasion they have all forgotten about me and you. I did not send mother's day cards out either. I will not send any birthday cards this year since I do not get. Plus they broke a promise they made to me and they lied at the service. Since you did not have life insurance or medical only VA they said they would pay for the service and all that entalied but they lied, Lenny and I had to gather the money to pay the whole thing. So why should I send them anything. I am sorry this was not suppose to be about all that. This was to honor you for Father's Day. I apologize.

 I am having trouble looking at cards for you Danny this year because they are all for husbands and dads that are here. And it just hurts still and is so raw that you are gone but will never be forgotten.

 My sons have not gotten or sent you a card either. That hurts there is no excuse for them or me. But I see you and talk to you everyday and tell you good night every night. My God Danny I miss you so very much and I just dont know what to do with all my feelings and myself I am so lost without you. I woke up this morning and you were on my mind, I for some reason had the last thing you really said to me was, "if anything happens I just want you to know I never went out on you". I was floored by that and could not even respond. So it hurts so much that you must have known something was wrong. And it still hurts and angers me that maybe you might still be here if your parents would have left you alone and let you stay in the hospital under your doctors care instead of pushing for you to get out so they could come to the house. I feel like sueing them sometimes when I think about all the crap they did and said. You could not even go in peace without your mom being a witch at your services and stole the horse statue from one of the flowers until Pat said something to me about her having it. Unbelievable. I want to sue them not the doctors. I cant beleive it has been 17 months that you are gone the time has flown by and things are no better. Not even a little. I exist everyday but dont care to, I get up every morning, but dont want to. I love you my darling and miss you with all my heart. I would rather be telling you this in person and holding you in my arms then writing it to you. This is just not right or fair. I dont even think it is good to tell you Happy Father's Day because how can it be when your not here. You were and are the best and again I love you with all my heart. You ride that horse in the sky you go cowboy ride like the wind. Like the song, "shoulda been a cowboy" well you were, even though for a little while you got your wish. All my heart, all my body and soul are with you. And one day we will be together again and then, "The Best Will Be" Love For All Time, Your loving wife Sweetie Rona xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox